Disney Gave Me Unrealistic Expectations about LOVE

Thank you Disney for teaching us that:

Glass slippers and pumpkin carriages are comfortable,
Meeting strangers in the forest is a good idea,
Difficulties and obstacles don't drive men away, but inspire them to pursue you even more,
Swapping your voice and family for a pair of legs is a good deal,
If you love them enough, love will transform beasts or ugly frogs into gorgeous Princes,
A man will fall in love with you at first sight if you look pretty enough,
Men will change when they grown up and fall in love, 

Do we ever really Love? Or is it just a decision to love? An imitation of what we have been taught love is, and should look like, how everything should play out?

"If, from our childhood on, the examples of love were not there inviting us to copy them, would we know what "loving" means?" -Milan Kundera, The Torn Curtain.

Ever found yourself actually searching for someone to crush on? Have certain criteria, search, ask around, then find them and start bombarding that person with your emotions? Can we really ever love a person who we don't know intimately? Because if we don't know that person, if we haven't seen the true them, their souls, how can we say that we love them? Do we simply love the idea of them, our perception of them? We take people, and make them fit into our fantasy of how love should work, turning away from the things that don't fit, filling in the blanks, and concentrating on our perceptions.
Are we just constantly trying to play out our own fantasies without pausing to remove the filter, the pink glasses from our eyes and actually see the real picture?

Going back to the quote, if we were not shown/told those horrendous lies by the Disney corporation on what love is, would we perceive it differently?
------Would women still believe that their role is to be passive, to wait, to be the one who is pursued endlessly, the damsel in distress, the Princess?
------Would women still believe that men have to be macho-men, brave, fearless, the pursuer, the savior, the Prince Charming on a White Stallion?

Or would we have different ideas on how this whole thing should work?
More realistic ideas?

Really, Disney dug us a very deep hole to fall into right after childhood.
Once we grow up and get our reality checks, we hit rock bottom. It just doesn't make sense in our minds, everything we've been taught before just doesn't seem to work. We blame ourselves, or make excuses. But simply, we've been fed lies.
Time to grow up, ladies. 
Chances are, that there is no Prince Charming coming to get you from the damn tower. So learn to walk on your own.
Don't expect this perfect scenario. All you'll get is pain and dissapointment.

Now, of course I'm not saying that romance is dead, or that men are incapable of love.
What I'm saying is that if you ahead of time, set up this screenplay of how exactly things should go, what is the Right Way, then you're just doomed. There is absolutely so way any human being can live up to your standards. So don't expect them to.

Besides, if it isn't rough, it isn't fun. The complications and imperfections are what make the relationships work in a way, they make them real, they give them the opportunity to grow and improve.

Why teach kinds stuff that they will have to relearn later? Why simplify things just so they get shocked out of it by how weird and complicated everything really is? Why drill these expectations into their brains and shut out other possibilities or variations? Why is it impossible to love an ugly person? A fat person? A person of the same sex? This is possible, but it comes as such a shock, because we were not shown that option. It was simply never offered to us as kids.
So why not get them really ready for what's out there but set them up for pain and disappointment? Or is that a natural part of life? Or have we just gotten use to it so much that we simply believe that its a natural part of life?

Think for yourself. Make your own decisions and opinions. Don't simply accept what's been offered to you on a platter.
















BY THE WAY...
While we're on the whole Disney Theme, a modern artist recently drew a more grown-up version of the Princes.. take a look: (hint: they're wearing nothing but undies.. mmm..) 
 
http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/39849010.html#cutid1

Related Posts : disney, expectations, life, love, men, myths, prince, princess, thinking, women